3. You have been told more than once that the thirty are the new twenty and you have thought it was the biggest bullshit in the world.
4. The soundtrack of your childhood is that of Sailor Moon (and a little also that of the Backstreet Boys: stop doing the cool saying that you liked Billy Joe of the Green Day, that Nick Carter's hair to hunt you loved ).
5. The first anxiety crisis you had was when your tamagochi died under a lot of poop, and it was your fault.
6. There was nothing prettier than receiving an SMS from your first boyfriend (and if I didn't give you 428 touches a day I didn't really love you).
7. Since you have left the first crow's feet these little animals do not like you anymore.
8. You have seen Bruce Willis with hair, the debut of the Spice Girls and the retro hairstyle of Raffaella Carrá (ah well, that's always the same).
9. When you were 20, the thirties were mythological creatures (of the worst) that sneaked into nightclubs and mixed between young and beautiful people. Today that old man is you.
10. If your boyfriend finally leaves you, you would be in a critical situation: 1/3 of your hypothetical soul mate would be compromised, 1/3 gay and 1/3 a pathological case. Like you.
11. There is no bigger compliment than that of the doorman who asks you for the card to find out that you are indeed of legal age.
12. When you went to college, your stomach was known as the most legendary in eastern Italy. Today, after 3 bottles you look like the drunk pirate friend of Capitón Hook.
13. And speaking of hangover: the hangover the day after has been transformed into the hangover 3 days later.
14. You begin to take walks and without realizing it you end up with your hands crossed behind your back like a grandfather. What next step will it be? Give directions in the works?
15. The weekend before was synonymous with makeup and handsome dress, today is synonymous with pajamas and film.
16. Your friends have married and had children with the same ease with which you had blows of madness.
17. When you register on a website and you have to insert your year of birth it takes half an hour to find it.
18. Do your relatives not only stress you with the question 'When are you getting married?' if not they have become demanding and now they also ask 'when you give us a churrumbel?
19. If before heels were your daily bread today they have become on the list of 'risk sports'.
20. You no longer believe in growth fever: 15 years ago you have not grown by 1 mm.
21. At 20 you could throw yourself in the coldest alpine lake in the world that the next day you were still happy and fit. Today you have to wrap up until you enter the Mercadona, that the frozen aisle is very treacherous.
22. When you go out with your lifelong friends, you spend hours and hours remembering 'that time ...' and you usually don't remember anything.
23. And speaking of friends, you have two new, inseparable ones: they are called dark circles.
24. Some muscles that you didn't even know existed start to hurt, not to mention your back!
25. When you go to sleep you don't sleep: you spend the first two hours thinking about how to solve the problems of the universe, and you get depressed.
26. You have been told, at least once, you.
27. You haven't found anything longer than Oliver and Benji's soccer field.
28. You know that Nutella is a panacea that never fails: it goes well for everything, better than an ibopruphene.
29. You wonder when, once and for all, your mental age will coincide with physics (it is from 13 that does not happen!).
30. However, even if you are an old chocha, you don't lose a good mood, because in the end you know it: the thirty are the new twenty!
